1202nb+Pet+Peeves

The Dinner Table

WHEN did farting, slurping, and sneezing become part of the dinner time routine?

When I was a toddler, my mom always told me to have good manners at the dinner table. Boy, have things changed! Occasionally there would be a burp and you would excuse yourself, but now there’s sneezing without even covering your mouth!

“MOM! Excuse you!”

“What, that was a motorcycle.”

“Sure, Mom, whatever makes you sleep at night.”

As you can see, my mom used to teach me nice manners like, “Natalie cross your legs during dinner,” “ Natalie, put your napkin on your lap during dinner,” “Natalie chew with your mouth closed during dinner,” and “Natalie, excuse yourself when you have to let out gas.”

At the dinner table, my grandma “lets out gas” and claims she can't even feel it come out so she blames it on Nicole, Jillian, and me.

All of you know that colds can happen from someone sneezing on you, but it’s even worse when someone sneezes on your food.

“BEEELCH”

“That was a good one, Mom!” I need a new family, I murmured to myself.

You may feel that sneezing with your mouth open and farting at the dinner table is natural and that you can't stop it, but when you feel the wet drops on your face and the smell of rotten eggs on your food you may feel the same way I do.

Over the years my family has gotten worse and worse with manners, and I need to stand up and say something, for the sake of someone coming over.

I don't know when my Mom, Dad, and sister felt the need to become such pigs at the dinner table!

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